Tuesday, September 13, 2005

"Now a better blog!"

I was just enjoying a "fun-size" bag of Doritos Nacho Cheesier chips. "Fun-size" is the manufacturers' name for the smallest-size bag, although, I would think the largest size would be the most fun. Anyhoo, while I was contemplating what was printed on the bag, I noticed it also says, "Now better tasting!"

Huh?

How, exactly, are they able to make such a claim? Who is qualified to tell me what I'll think tastes better? Isn't that the same as if a woman, after changing the way she does her hair, walks around with a sign that says, "Now more attractive"? Or a guy who, after seemingly bathing himself in cheap cologne, wears a shirt that declares, "Now better smelling"?

As a guy who has just recently both; cut off all his hair and, began wearing a new cologne, I can say with authority that my looks and signature musk are still nothing to brag about.

Do not be fooled by Doritos' lies and exaggerations, they are clearly not looking out for our best interests.

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16 Comments:

Blogger Bazooka-Joe said...

Oh the power of suggestion. It can make a man eat a potato and/or corn chip that will even cause him to leak anally (no lie, Olestra!). It can certainly get the weak-minded to believe something tastes better.

"You don't want to sell me Better Tasting Doritos. You want to go home and rethink your life."

Tuesday, September 13, 2005 8:14:00 AM  
Blogger Dan said...

You read my mind Pecadillo! I was just looking at this bag of Doritos over lunch wondering how to react to the "Now Better Tasting!" message.

Maybe I should be happy that Frito Lay has developed the definitive equation to quantify my taste experience.

Maybe I should be skeptical that they are the EXACT same chip with a new bag. It could all be in my mind!

Maybe I should be annoyed that they used to sell me chips that did not meet their taste potential!

Maybe I should just wait for the “Now BEST tasting” chips to be discovered.

Tuesday, September 13, 2005 1:00:00 PM  
Blogger centuri0n said...

< joke >
Who are you to judge, Pecadillo? Does the Bible tell you which amount of fake cheese makes Doritos better tasting? What if your mouth is deceiving you?

Obviously, you have not read Descartes and Locke, and you are trapped in Modernity. If you weren't Baptist, it would be funny.
< /joke >

Tuesday, September 13, 2005 4:05:00 PM  
Blogger Tony Myles said...

Lousy Doritos people...

always telling me what to eat...

Tuesday, September 13, 2005 7:15:00 PM  
Blogger suzi said...

Let me add that someday, when you have taken a wife and she has just had her hair done, you would be wise to each and everytime acknowlegde the added beauty it has given her. Hey, for some of us hair does make that difference. ( Note to my brother, Muffin as well :; )

Wednesday, September 14, 2005 1:13:00 PM  
Blogger theGracegirl said...

"Let me add that someday, when you have taken a wife and she has just had her hair done, you would be wise to each and everytime acknowlegde the added beauty it has given her."

Or, she could take as you saying that she wasn't pretty to begin with, and that she desperately needs the help of a salon to make her attractive. Ah, the twisted, er, complicated, female mind--no man can predict our reactions!

Wednesday, September 14, 2005 1:23:00 PM  
Blogger suzi said...

lol, oh so true...tread carefully thinking before speaking :)

Wednesday, September 14, 2005 3:20:00 PM  
Blogger Pecadillo said...

Lucyplusfour

So what's the deal, are you Matt and Muffin's sister?

Wednesday, September 14, 2005 5:15:00 PM  
Blogger Joanna Martens said...

on a more logical note..(given this blog, *i think* it needs one), i'd like to take into consideration the quote on the doritos bag.
"Now better tasting"
Who was the judge to decide what is better tasting? What if the other doritos were just as good? What irritates me is all these statements proclaiming an absolute truth when in fact, nothing is absolute.
I'm positive on that. Besides, the old bag design was prettier.

Wednesday, September 14, 2005 6:21:00 PM  
Blogger Pecadillo said...

9digits said:

"...nothing is absolute.
I'm positive on that."

So does that mean you’re not absolutely positive that you're a sinner? How 'bout if God exists?

You might want to rethink your comments; I'm pretty sure non-believers read my blog.

Wednesday, September 14, 2005 6:53:00 PM  
Blogger suzi said...

well, smart boy as above I said Muffin's sister...yes you have our whole family reading your blog now. We really enjoy it! (p.s. hubs was witchie woman) I could only resist posting for so long. Hope you don't mind.

Wednesday, September 14, 2005 8:02:00 PM  
Blogger Dan said...

I have no problems with absolute statesments on the bag. For example, "Now Contains 90% Air!"; but I do have a problem with an absolute statement for something that is actually subjective like, "Nacho Cheese is the Best!"

Keep up the good work Pecadillo, I've got my bro (Mike) checking out your site too, so pretty soon you'll be able to brand your site with something like, "Now With More Fun for the Whole Family!" :-D

Thursday, September 15, 2005 1:37:00 AM  
Blogger Bazooka-Joe said...

Or uh...something like..."4 out of 5 people that visit my blog are related!" Or even, "20% say it's 'not terrible'." Sheesh, truth in advertising. Does omission count?

Nice job Pecadillo. Incidentally, did you know peccadillo (with two C's) means: "A slight offense; a petty fault."? So it's fair to say, everybody has their peccadilloes. :)

Thursday, September 15, 2005 10:00:00 AM  
Blogger Joanna Martens said...

i suppose maybe i should be more specific when i'm joking around...
on a more serious note, denial of absolutes is an absolute in and of itself. It's a self-refuting statement. I'll make sure to be more conscise next time...
cheers!

Thursday, September 15, 2005 11:22:00 AM  
Blogger Sojourner said...

Pecadillo,

Thank you so much for writing this post. I have been a life-long Doritos fan, and I am saddened by their need to revamp something that ain't broken. Further, I do not find that they are better.

Now what do I have to look forward to at the bottom of the bag? You see, it used to be that this was the place where the smaller, yet tastier chips dwelt. Smaller because they have been smashed, tastier because more cheese made it to the bottom. What dorito fan hasn't had the experience of turning up the bag to get those last few crumbs? Now with this new fangled Dorito style it just isn't the same.

Now that's all gone. Woe is me that I have to live in such days.

Thursday, September 15, 2005 2:38:00 PM  
Blogger Nathan said...

"Now that's all gone. Woe is me that I have to live in such days."

So do all lament who live to see such days. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us. There are other forces at work, sojourner, than the will of evil. Pecadillo was meant to post this blog. In which case you also were meant to read it, and that is an encouraging thought.

Thursday, September 15, 2005 8:34:00 PM  

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